Life in a Nut Shell

Things are happening.
Life's a changin'.
Chris and I broke up.
Waters are weird.
Don't know what's happening.
Oh, C & I broke up a year ago, so no crazy news, just, thought I'd mention it.
Trying to get back in the habit of choosing the habit and not being addicted.
Yup.
That's all for now, folks!

I apologize for the ridiculous gap in posting.

Welcome to the beginning of the end of the way things used to be. Here in these parts, we call blogs things, and I've got a thing or two to say about the future. It is wide open. We do not know what tomorrow may hold (though many of us have a pretty good guess) and we do not know what surprises may expose themselves. However, we do know that we have this neat little thing called free will, and we can use it and abuse it at will, to create that which has not yet been created by our own hand or to affect some change in those things where we have not yet affected that exact change before.

To put it slightly differently, I may have lost my job, and here I sit, twiddling my thumbs and hoping the future hold something bright. I find out what the future hold for myself and the Salon in just a few quick short fleeting days. Depending on where that road takes me, I will be stationary (though a beam of light is never really stationary, and we are all made of stars) until the Friday that I know I get paid something (however small that sum may be). The way I'm thinking is perhaps not the wisest but damnit, it will be fun. Listen to me good.

I'm going up to Atlanta today (unless through some twist of arm I have the opportunity for something spectacular here in the evening, but that's never really reliable enough to plan on) and I will surround myself with beauty, freedom, peace, truth, and love, which is going to be hard, cause I'll be around family, but I'll give it my best shot. I'll peruse some maps and send some more e-mails contacting people I haven't talked to in way too long. I may double post betwixt here and livejournal to keep up with those loves on that side of the world, and I doubt I'm motivated enough to write two separate blogs. Shucks, I have 12 here and we have all seen how well that works out.

Anyways, I'll do some instrument love today in the morning, maybe grab a bite, cut some hair, get some coffee and another book or two at JudyBug's Books, and then hit the road (I know it never did anything to me, but a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do, and that car's not going to drive itself). Yes, it's off to Atlanta first, then back to Columbus (because that makes no sense at all and that's exactly how I like to do things) then perhaps to Philadelphia or New Orleans... We'll find out when we get there where we're going, and what on earth we might be doing.

Did I mention anyone and everyone is welcome to join, as long as you have no deadlines, no whining or complaining counterparts (expecially parts of yourself), and nowhere to go and nothing to do as long as we both shall live?

Dear World,
I am still haphazardly attempting to create a portfolio for hair. If you are interested in a new, updated, or just redone color, cut, or style, please give me a call (678-458-6268) or drop me an email (micahLJones@yahoo.com - didn't want the capital letters there, but they make it easier to see... you know).

Holiday seasons are always awkward. There's always people I really want to get in touch with, or at least see for a day or two, but these things never seem to happen. I don't die, I admit it: I'll be the first to admit that an absence of people in my life does not have a fatal reaction. It's decoration, it's enhancement. But isn't that what everybody is? It's terrible when someone leaves you, but generally, you go on living.Your life is about you... not you and these really cool 2 - 20 other random people. those people have their own stories - how insulting of us to think about casting them as supporting actresses and actors when they are the leading role in a different plot?
Anyways, I think it would be nice if those of you who care such mindnumbing things would send me your addresses so I can send you holiday greetings, new years greetings, valentines day greetings, st patricks day greetings, lent greetings (because it's interesting watching american's say "no," and I don't really care about easter, but if you let me know your birthday too I'll send you a birthday card, when I'm rich and famous it might have money in it, we can write each other if/when we get married, have kids, have "getting divorced parties" 10 years later, have more marriage notifcations and more kids, and then a big 'ol throwdown at Aunt Jenny's Trailor... ok, most of those last parts are fabricated.

But for those of you who still know how to read more than a celll phone size message, I hope this is somewhat entertaining and I do hope we keep in touch. Oh, and sometimes, I like to have big birthday bashes and they include lots of alcohol. Sometimes. Not all the time. I will differentiate in the invitation. Another reason to keep in touch via SNAIL mail.

On Facebook and VampireRave, this paragraph was used to rant about the unfortunate mass misuse of the possible potential of the site and to rant on the general uselessness of these online things.
But I love LiveJournal. I admit, I was a deadjournal user long before, and liked it first. But I've grown to love the goat. And I've never had a problem with journals.
Keep up, up'in and away'in.

Well, I hope Morrowind or Call of Duty or Tennis don't suck my life away forever. Wouldn't want to miss another thrilling opportunity to give you MY two cents on the hotNabit sitchwashun herr.

Thanks for reading,
Micah

I never heard of Fml.
I am usually always on top of that stuff. but I've been in Columbus for the last several weeks trying to hold a secure job a residence till I get settled in.

life is very lifey lately.

Things are slowly getting much better.
There are things that happened the last 3 and a half years that I don't understand. Things that I don't appreciate maybe as much as I should. But I recognize them, their existence, maybe some purpose in them. Or at least the experience, and the growth from it.
I've cleansed myself of many things.

I've learned that sometimes we aren't honest with each other.
There are some things Chris doesn't tell me.
But everything he's told me has been the truth. He may have left some things out. Sometimes he exaggerates.

But he always tells me the complete truth. If I ask him, if I want to know something, he understands what I want to know, and he knows me well, and he tells me everything.

The time when we lie to each other to protect each other is over.

We've grown so much. There's so many stories, moments, times and things inside of the conversations and the looks, the stories. The comments, the smells, the emotions. We're on the same side. He scratches my back, I scratch his. We do good things for each other. We look out for each other. We protect each other. We watch each others' back.

That's love. I can tell him anything. and I do. and he does the same to me. When we have a problem, we talk to each other. We work it out. I understand when to not push him. He knows when I need to be left alone. We understand each other.

Sometimes, there's the unexpected. The surprising comment, or glance, or experience. Things come up that we don't expect. We handle in our own way. With style, grace, passion, humor, indignation, fashion, love, righteousness.

For two atheists, I think we're some of the best damn people you'll ever meet.

Maybe they don't understand. Our moments of sadness, depression, frustration, lost emotion - they are moments of our own genetic flaws, weaknesses - they are challenges, but they spawn great and beautiful art and passion, and stories - adventures. I don't like people to read my blog because I have problems. My personal blog on blogger can be nasty, and sad, and horrible. I say terrible things. But it is my frustration, my venting, my issues. These are not concrete, valid emotions that I would act on (hopefully).

They are challenges. And she understand that, because she doesn't understand me, or him. She doesn't understand that she was fundamentally opposed to his freedom - as a human - and that caused problems. Nobody should be in a cage. She hurt him. He has physical scars from the broken bottles, the knives, the fist fights, the outrageous misunderstandings.
The saddest part is that she was really cool, at first. She became something unbearable for him. If you don't have depression - if you don't suffer from uncaused and illogical bouts of emotional trauma - then you can't understand it. But those emotions - that experience - that gives you a depth in understanding, in empathy - in experience - that just lacks in some people.


I'm not excusing anything. I'm not writing anyone off. Things change. People go on vacation, move, get jobs elsewhere, and sometimes things just happen. And we learn. We accept the boundaries that exist and then we create new ones.

We love. And we live. sometimes we love together, or live somewhere else. But these things are in constant motion until we know no more. That moment - we know all things. we become the reason - the point - the pinnacle, when you get right down to it.

your love. my love. our love.
our lives go on. our experiences grow.
we shrink. we envelope all.
i'm rambling.

Dear you, I miss you, but I don't know what to say. I am in a sticky situation. I require more than several dozens of days to figure everything out. I don't know what's going to happen. I am going to spend some time diving with myself.

Dear me, here's hoping. I hope you understand. I can't wait to see me again.
Love,
Me

Quotes from the famous comedian Bill Hicks.
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=1366476727111157120




“People are bringing shotguns to UFO sightings in Fife, Alabama. I asked a guy, "Why do you bring a gun to a UFO sighting?" Guy said, "Way-ul, we didn' wanna be ab-duc-ted." If I lived in Fife, Alabama, I would be on my hands and knees every night praying for abduction.”

“I'll show you politics in America. Here it is, right here. 'I think the puppet on the right shares my beliefs.' 'I think the puppet on the left is more to my liking.' 'Hey, wait a minute, there's one guy holding out both puppets!'”

“I can speak for every guy in this room here tonight. Guys, if you could blow yourselves, ladies, you'd be in this room alone right now. Watching an empty stage.”

“Why is marijuana against the law? It grows naturally upon our planet. Doesn't the idea of making nature against the law seem to you a bit . . . unnatural?”

“Your denial is beneath you, and thanks to the use of hallucinogenic drugs, I see through you.”

“I have something to tell you non-smokers that I know for a fact that you don't know, and I feel it's my duty to pass on information at all times. Ready?. . . . Non-smokers die every day . . . Enjoy your evening. See, I know that you entertain this eternal life fantasy because you've chosen not to smoke, but let me be the 1st to POP that bubble and bring you hurling back to reality . . . You're dead too.”

“Here is my final point. About drugs, about alcohol, about pornography and smoking and everything else. What business is it of yours what I do, read, buy, see, say, think, who I fuck, what I take into my body - as long as I do not harm another human being on this planet?”

“The worst kind of non-smokers are the ones that come up to you and cough. That's pretty fucking cruel isn't it? Do you go up to cripples and dance too?”

“I love the Pope, I love seeing him in his Pope-Mobile, his three feet of bullet proof plexi-glass. That's faith in action folks! You know he's got God on his side.”

“God help me. I'm so tired. I need my sleep. I make no bones about it. I need eight hours a day, and at least ten at night. . . .”

“Watching television is like taking black spray paint to your third eye.”

“You ever noticed how people who believe in Creationism look really unevolved? You ever noticed that? Eyes real close together, eyebrow ridges, big furry hands and feet. "I believe God created me in one day" Yeah, looks like He rushed it.”

“No, I don't do drugs anymore, either. But I'll tell you something about drugs. I used to do drugs, but I'll tell you something honestly about drugs, honestly, and I know it's not a very popular idea, you don't hear it very often anymore, but it is the truth: I had a great time doing drugs. Sorry. Never murdered anyone, never robbed anyone, never raped anyone, never beat anyone, never lost a job, a car, a house, a wife or kids, laughed my ass off, and went about my day.”

“You believe the world's 12 thousand years old? "That's right." Okay I got one word to ask you, a one word question, ready? "Uh huh." Dinosaurs. You know the world's 12 thousand years old and dinosaurs existed, they existed in that time, you'd think it would have been mentioned in the fucking Bible at some point. "And lo Jesus and the disciples walked to Nazareth. But the trail was blocked by a giant brontosaurus...with a splinter in his paw. And O the disciples did run a shriekin': 'What a big fucking lizard, Lord!' But Jesus was unafraid and he took the splinter from the brontosaurus's paw and the big lizard became his friend.”

“I'm tired of this back-slapping "Isn't humanity neat?" bullshit. We're a virus with shoes, okay? That's all we are.”

“The world is like a ride in an amusement park. And when you choose to go on it you think it's real because that's how powerful our minds are. And the ride goes up and down and round and round. It has thrills and chills and it's very brightly coloured and it's very loud and it's fun, for a while. Some people have been on the ride for a long time and they begin to question: "Is this real, or is this just a ride?" And other people have remembered, and they come back to us, they say, "Hey, don't worry, don't be afraid, ever, because this is just a ride." And we kill those people.”

“Children are smarter than any of us. Know how I know that? I don't know one child with a full time job and children.”

“They lie about marijuana. Tell you pot-smoking makes you unmotivated. Lie! When you're high, you can do everything you normally do, just as well. You just realize that it's not worth the fucking effort. There is a difference.”

“I have never seen two people on pot get in a fight because it is fucking IMPOSSIBLE. "Hey, buddy!" "Hey, what?" "Ummmmmmm...." End of argument.”

“It's always funny until someone gets hurt. Then it's just hilarious.”

“I smoke. If this bothers anyone, I suggest you look around at the world in which we live and shut your fuckin' mouth.”

“I don't mean to sound bitter, cold, or cruel, but I am, so that's how it comes out.”

“I believe that God left certain drugs growing naturally upon our planet to help speed up and facilitate our evolution. OK, not the most popular idea ever expressed. Either that or you're all real high and agreeing with me in the only way you can right now. (Starts blinking)”

“One of my big fears in life is that I'm gonna die and my parents are going to come to clean out my apartment and find that porno wing I've been adding on to for years.”

“I never got along with my dad. Kids used to come up to me and say, "My dad can beat up your dad." I'd say, "Yeah? When?"”

“Supreme Court says pornography is anything without artistic merit that causes sexual thoughts; that's their definition, essentially. No artistic merit, causes sexual thoughts. Hmm. . . . Sounds like . . . every commercial on television, doesn't it?”

“You know we armed Iraq. I wondered about that too, you know during the Persian Gulf war those intelligence reports would come out: "Iraq: incredible weapons - incredible weapons." How do you know that? "Uh, well...we looked at the receipts."”

“People ask me what I think about that woman priest thing. What, a woman priest? Women priests. Great, great. Now there's priests of both sexes I don't listen to.”

http://chaosmagick.tribe.net/thread/9d515f0a-6a86-4cdf-8639-1307fb190bc9

http://chaosmagick.tribe.net/

I always find it entertaining when people feel the need to argue online. Especially in mass numbers. Very efficient and practical.

But that forum... seems somewhat useful. So I'll dig a little more later.
Here's to banishings and meditation.

This has been a really difficult week. In a few fell swoops, I was almost lost two people close to me, one of my best friends lost someone close, I was reminded of a lot of things I didn't want to be reminded of, etc...

And yet through all of this, Chris has been there for me, like a lighthouse on a coast, or a tree through a storm. You're the steed that saves me from every battle I try to weather on my own... and I'm so glad I have something to hang on to when I'm about to fall apart, and it feels like everything else is too.

My brother got into a bike accident. He's ok, thank eris. but he's recovering, very out of it, cracked some mouth parts, ripped himself pretty bad. He's good though, alive, and making it, only a couple stitches... just really scary.
Leigh Anne had alcohol poisoning, but she's doing great now. Just really scary to hug someone you've been really close to at various points in your life and feel them about to ignite at a ridiculously high temperature and covered in sweat.
And my condolences to the Dunns... our closest friends for a long time. Our thoughts(and sigils!) with you.


On a less intense note, I didn't get to do color today. I did a pedicure and a haircut. So I would be lucky to get 10$ in tips tomorrow (probably more like 5) when I could have gotten 25. Hoorah.

But I know I'm cutting a few people's hair this week. So I can make a little money there. I plan on calling some schools to see if they need some volunteer stylists for student events, maybe films or shows or things.

Heck, as soon as I get my license, I can just go on craigslist and put out flyers. I'll look into some legal stuff, but it should be too hard for me, so long as I claim what I make.
I hope it's that simple.


Here's to less intense news the rest of the year. The most intense I want is pay raises, A's and B's, unions with family and friends, and surprisingly large amounts of money from mundane situations.

Thank you to everyone, for your concern and thoughts and prayers. It is appreciated and cherished!

some of my friends are going through stuff right now. I've been through some crazy stuff myself recently. But I want to tell every one of my friends how appreciative of them I am, and how glad I am that they have been part of my life and still are.
You are all such beautiful people.

My sister is good. Last night she got sick, but she's better, and she seems to be feeling better. So... I am happy about this.
I got mo' money fo' my birthday. Maybe this will allow me to buy some of the supplies I need for the Georgia Cosmetology Licensing test thing. It's turning out to be a little more than I was planning for (150) just because I need a new mannequin, nail supplies, some tupperware and ziplock bags. That's probably another 60 bucks or so. blaaaaaaaaaaak. is ok. i will be fine.

In other news, I think that I will be fine in a salon, and I am very happy with my supplies. I have a long foil, single process, and haircut tomorrow. Hoorah!
And then, Columbus for the weekend! I get to see my honey, friends, my grandma. it will be fun.

Here's to life!

CHEERS!